7 x 7 = an award for FilmFather!

Alyson of The Best Picture Project has deemed me worthy of the 7x7 Link Award (well, me and six other bloggers).

What is the 7x7 Link Award, you ask? It highlights a blogger's favorite pieces of work and is passed on to others so they too can do the same as a way to promote posts and/or blogs.

Without much ado or further adieu, my answers to the 7x7 Award's questions.

1. Tell everyone something that no one else knows about you.
In Little League, I was picked off second base while talking to the opposing shortstop about Atari games.

2. Link to your posts that best fit the following categories:

a) Most beautiful piece:
I'd hardly call any of my reviews beautiful, but the one I feel is the most elegantly haunting is We Need to Talk About Kevin. Writing about that film made its disturbing and harrowing subject matter burrow even deeper into my psyche.

b) Most helpful piece:
My review of LEGO: The Adventures of Clutch Powers, because it helps bring attention and exposure to a criminally little-known yet fantastic family film (that includes parents, too).

c) Most popular piece:
Aside from the occasional blip, it's been my most consistently popular post, according to that widget on the right: Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

d) Most controversial piece:
That's a toss-up: either my review of The Land Before Time or The Secret of NIMH. I'm no fan of Don Bluth (the former Disney animator and director of both films), and I let it show in what I wrote. I let any differing opinions stay in the comments sections, but I've actually had to delete personal attacks on me and my children from die-hard Bluth fans. Looking back, I might be less harsh if I reviewed these films today; my then-only son was a preschooler at the time, so I was definitely more protective about what he saw.

e) Surprisingly successful piece:
I knew it would be successful, but I had no idea how successful: my review of the exploitative, entertaining, B-movie classic The Sword and the Sorcerer, with 19 comments as of this post. It even received a comment from the director himself, Albert Pyun - the first comment, and on my birthday no less!

f) Most underrated piece:
Sadly, my review of L.A. Confidential. I worked hard on that one, and was certain that my take on this modern classic would open the floodgates for comments of agreement by fellow cinephiles. Unfortunately, the only comment I got was, "Hey, where are all the comments?"

g) Most pride-worthy piece:
Can I substitute "pride" with "schadenfreude?" If so, I choose my review of the absolutely horrible Santa Claus Conquers the Martians. The filmmakers gave me so much to sink my fangs into, I should really thank them for it.

3. Pass this award on to 7 other bloggers.
Cinema du Meep
Daddy Geek Boy
Dinner with Max Jenke
The Droid You're Looking For
Enter the Man-Cave
Luke, I Am Your Father
Me and You and a Blog Named Boo

Chico & Rita (2010)

AN ELDERLY MAN shines shoes in modern-day Havana. Later, at his cramped, run-down apartment, he turns on the radio and listens to an oldies station play a Latin jazz hit from the late 1940s. He sets his fingers on the window sill, and softly plays along with the opening notes of the piano as a sultry female voice begins to sing…

The old man is Chico (Eman Xor Oña), the song is one of his recordings with Rita (Limara Meneses), and Chico & Rita is their story. Told over a span of 60 years, it follows Chico and Rita as they meet at a Havana nightclub, and after a torrid one night stand and a few misunderstandings (oops, he has a girlfriend), they chase their dreams and each other from Havana to New York, Paris, Hollywood, and Las Vegas – all while encountering missed or blown opportunities in their careers and their relationship.

The animation in Chico & Rita is a fresh detour from most major releases these days. It’s a unique, captivating style, like rotoscoping by way of CGI – with dimension, depth, and an amazing attention to detail, especially in the cityscapes of Havana, New York City, and Paris.

The Latin jazz soundtrack of Chico & Rita permeates nearly every frame, either in the background or front and center. It features original music by legendary Cuban pianist/composer Bebo Valdés (on whom Chico is loosely based) as well as legends such as Thelonious Monk, Charlie Parker, Cole Porter, Dizzy Gillespie, Woody Herman, Tito Puente, and Chano Pozo (who all have animated cameos in the film).

Ironically, for all the excitement, passion, and life that the soundtrack brings to Chico & Rita, the story itself is a predominately quiet one, with most action and conversations very reserved and mellow. And despite all the globetrotting and love-hate yearnings Chico and Rita share and experience, there’s not enough of an investment in the time they spend together to make us feel for the times they’re apart.

Chico & Rita was nominated for a 2012 Academy Award for Best Animated Feature (along with Kung Fu Panda 2 and the deserving winner, Rango), and directors Javier Mariscal and Fernando Trueba should be credited for bringing something unique to the animation genre. But even the engaging animation and lively Latin soundtrack can’t save or elevate the muted love story that could have been.

Spanish, with subtitles.

Rating:

Is it suitable for your kids?

Chico & Rita is an animated feature released by the largely kid-friendly GKIDS, but it is definitely not for children. Rita is fully nude for an extended scene, she and Chico are both nude while making love, and several women’s bare behinds are shown. In terms of violence: Chico’s girlfriend and Rita fight across Chico’s apartment floor, Chico is shot in a dream sequence, and another character is shot several times and killed. There is also drinking, smoking, profanities, and one racial slur.

Will your FilmMother want to watch it?

If she’s a fan of the Latin jazz movement, she may enjoy the sounds and scenery of Chico & Rita. But if she’s a fan of love stories, she may feel underwhelmed by Chico and Rita’s romance.

Her name was Rita / She was a showgirl...

His name was Chico / He wore a diamond...

I heard they played at the hottest spot north of Havana.

Chico & Rita
* Directors: Javier Mariscal, Fernando Trueba
* Screenwriters: Ignacio Martínez de Pisón, Fernando Trueba
* Stars: Limara Meneses, Eman Xor Oña, Mario Guerra
* MPAA Rating: N/A


Rent Chico & Rita from Netflix >>

Starcrash (1979)

IT’S NO SECRET that after the blockbuster success of Star Wars in 1977, a glut of quickie, low-budget space sagas flooded the market over the next few years, all looking to cash in on the phenomenon.

And probably no one in the history of motion pictures has successfully mastered the art of “quick” and “low-budget” like the legendary Roger Corman. So it’s a no-brainer that he entered this stampede of sci-fi schlock by producing the 1979 turkey Starcrash.


Marjoe Gortner (Bobbie Jo & The Outlaw) and Caroline Munro play a pair of interplanetary smugglers recruited by an emperor (Christopher Plummer) of a nearby planet to help defeat the evil Count Zarth Arn (Joe Spinell) of the League of the Dark Worlds (DUN-DUN dunnn…), who’s planning to use The Doom Machine (DUN-DUN dunnn…) to destroy the emperor and his planet (dun, dun, DUNNN!!!).

Picking the best worst element of Starcrash is like trying to pick a favorite color of the rainbow. There are so many to savor: unconvincing miniature spaceship models, jarring editing, poor matting, the dated use of wipes and lap dissolves, melodramatic dialogue with expired phrases like “we’ve studied all the videotapes,” and cheesy stop-motion animation that immediately makes you yearn for anything by Ray Harryhausen. (Irony alert: Munro faced off against Harryhausen’s classic stop-motion creatures in 1973’s The Golden Voyage of Sinbad.)

The cast’s ham-fisted performances make it obvious they’re in on the joke. Gortner plays leading man Akton as part hero, part guide: Much of his dialogue consists of explaining oddities or advancing the threadbare plot. As space vixen Stella Star, Munro’s sexy British voice is removed and dubbed by American actress Candy Clark (Gortner’s then-wife). To compensate, Munro is scantily clad for much of the film – which is an additional blessing since her acting consists mostly of a raised eyebrow, scowling, smoldering stares, or a head-shake-and-grin combo.


As the Emperor, a slumming Christopher Plummer (who shot all his scenes in one day) gives as much regality and class as possible to his role, while Spinell (Rocky, Maniac) does such a good job hiding his Noo Yawk accent that is sounds like someone else dubbed his lines. And since everything can use a little Hoff, the Emperor’s son Simon (David Hasselhoff) shows up around the one-hour mark to help with the cause. However, it’s soon after Hasselhoff’s appearance that Starcrash starts to lose its playfulness – lumbering into a mundane, anemic third act despite lots of stuff getting blowed up real good.

Directed by Italian schlockmeister Luigi Cozzi (under the name Lewis Coates) and originally released in Italy as “Scontri Stellari Oltre la Terza Dimensione (Stellar Clashes Beyond the Third Dimension),” Starcrash wasn’t Corman’s only entry in the post-Star Wars sci-fi boom: He also produced the far superior Magnificent-Seven-in-space epic Battle Beyond The Stars.

In the finale of Starcrash, the Emperor orders his imperial battleship, “Halt the flow of time!” At many points during this clunker, it does indeed feel like time is standing still.

Rating:

Is it suitable for your kids?

Starcrash is rated PG: Several people are shot dead by laser guns; victims of a spaceship crash are shown frozen in the snow; Stella, Akton, and Simon engage in hand-to-hand combat with enemies at various points; and there is one utterance of “damn.” Basically, if your kids have seen Star Wars, there’s no reason they can’t watch Starcrash.

Will your FilmMother want to watch it?

The two of you could have some fun with Starcrash by goofing on it MST3K-style, but the novelty may wear off before the end credits roll. You’re probably better off exploring it alone as a morbid curiosity to see what makes it such a talked-about train wreck.

Yes, that’s a light saber. No, nothing is sacred.

Starcrash
* Director: Luigi Cozzi
* Screenwriters: Luigi Cozzi, Nat Wachsberger
* Stars: Marjoe Gortner, Caroline Munro, Joe Spinell, Christopher Plummer, David Hasselhoff, Robert Tessier, Judd Hamilton
* MPAA Rating: PG


Rent Starcrash from Netflix>>

Congrats to the winner of the ParaNorman Prize Pack!

And...

The winner is...

Antoinette Galindo!

Thanks to everyone who entered the contest!

Win a ParaNorman Prize Pack!

YOU COULD WIN a prize pack courtesy of Focus Features and animation company LAIKA's ParaNorman!

Synopsis:
In ParaNorman, a small town comes under siege by zombies. Who can it call? Only misunderstood boy Norman (Kodi Smit-McPhee), who is able to speak with the dead. In addition to the zombies, he'll have to take on ghosts, witches and, worst of all, grown-ups to save his town from a centuries-old curse. But this young ghoul whisperer may find his paranormal activities pushed to their otherworldly limits.

One winner will receive this awesome prize pack (a $65 value):

click to enlarge

• Freaky Fun Cupcake Kit
• Youth T-Shirt
• Backpack
• Activity Book & Activity Sheet
• Keychain
• Notebook
• Pencil Pack with Stickers
• Nightlight

  

  click to enlarge

• Slippers
• Toothbrush

How to Enter:
Comment on this post by August 29, 2012. I will then pick one comment at random and post the winner soon after. (The winner will have to e-mail me their mailing address to receive their prize pack.)

Rules:

• You must have a link to your e-mail address on your Blogger profile page. If not, you must provide your e-mail address in your comment.
• Prize pack is available to United States mailing addresses only.

Good luck!

The Sadist (1963)

THE SADIST OFTEN GETS OVERLOOKED and lumped in with the large amount of B-movie, drive-in dreck released during the mid-1960s – which is a shame, because it’s a taut, effective, and surprisingly brutal film for its era.

Shot in real time, The Sadist’s plot is unassumingly simple: Three schoolteachers on their way to a Dodgers ballgame – Carl (Don Russell), Ed (Richard Alden), and Doris (Helen Hovey) – have car trouble and pull into an isolated auto yard. There, they run into crazed killer Charlie (Arch Hall, Jr.) and his young, nubile girlfriend Judy (Marilyn Manning).


Working from his own script, director James Landis does a superb job of creating tension. Even early in the film, as the teachers arrive at the auto yard, Landis sets the foreboding tone: When Ed yells for assistance and all he hears is his echo, it’s clear any later cries for help will fall on deaf ears.

The Sadist also features fantastic camerawork, including great use of foregrounds and depth by a young Vilmos Zsigmond, whose later legendary cinematography includes Deliverance, The Deer Hunter, and an Oscar for Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

Just as Charlie shows no mercy for his hostages, Landis gives no relief to the audience. The Sadist is shockingly brutal and graphic for its time: Charlie verbally and physically tortures the teachers, and several scenes are indeed sadistic. The best example is the infamous “soda scene,” where Charlie tells one of his victims he’s going to shoot them in the head once he’s done his bottle of soda – all while the victim is on their knees, begging for their life. (An additional form of torture: Carl, Ed, and Doris can hear the ballgame they’re missing as it plays on the car radio.)

Hall’s performance as Charlie falls between nutjob killer and goofy caricature, and this combination is what makes him so frightening. With a twisted grimace and a maniacal giggle (which Hall admits he stole from Richard Widmark’s hitman in Kiss of Death), Charlie also shows on several occasions that he may be crazy, but he’s not stupid. He’s often one step ahead of his captors, whether it’s counting the number of bullets he’s used or showing he knows more about cars than Ed thinks he does.

One of the first films loosely based on 1950s serial killer Charles Starkweather (followed by the better-known Badlands and Natural Born Killers), The Sadist still packs a wallop nearly 50 years later. With a cast of five, one location, and a premise that (sadly) still resonates today, it’s a gem worth seeing.

aka Sweet Baby Charlie.

Rating:

Is it suitable for your kids?

No. Charlie menaces Carl, Ed, and Judy nonstop, threatening them with a gun and a knife. That’s on top of the actual violence: Charlie pistol-whips Carl and assaults Doris, kicking her and shoving her face in the dirt; Doris is slapped by Ed and Judy on separate occasions; a man is shot in the head in close-up; four others are shot dead; two other bodies are shown dead (shot by Charlie before Carl, Ed, and Doris arrived); Charlie talks about people he's killed in his travels; and a person is bitten to death by snakes. Also, Ed utters a minor profanity.

Will your FilmMother want to watch it?

The Sadist’s combination of violent content and being shot in black and white may not be appealing to some viewers. Unless your FilmMother has a penchant for ‘60s B-movies or films about thrill-killers, you may be watching this one alone.

 

Outta my way…I wanna carve my initials on this tree.

Watch The Sadist in its entirety:

The Sadist
* Director: James Landis
* Screenwriter: James Landis
* Stars: Arch Hall Jr., Richard Alden, Marilyn Manning, Don Russell, Helen Hovey
* MPAA Rating: N/A


Rent The Sadist from Netflix >>
Download The Sadist from the Internet Archive >>

FilmFather turns 4! Take this quiz to celebrate...

FilmFather turns 4 today!* Thanks to anyone and everyone who's followed, perused, or stumbled upon my humble opinions on film.

To celebrate, I've created a visual quiz. Each cropped image below is from the artwork of a "Part 4" film.

How many can you name?

Give your answers via comment.

The prize for naming them all first? A mention on my Twitter page...and bragging rights to whoever will listen to you. Good luck!

* Technically, 4 years and 1 month; not sure how I missed my own blog's anniversary.

Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)

WITH ICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT’S $47 million opening weekend (pushing its worldwide total to $380 million), the Ice Age films are now one of the highest-grossing movie franchises ever – up there with Harry Potter, James Bond, and Lord of the Rings.

As someone who’s seen the first Ice Age but not parts 2 or 3 (The Meltdown and Dawn of the Dinosaurs), I began to wonder if I was missing out on a rewarding movie franchise – one whose likability and popularity was apparently evident by its billions in box office and the millions of moviegoers who have kept the saga afloat since the original Ice Age in 2002.


After seeing Ice Age: Continental Drift -- the highly disposable yet occasionally endearing fourth entry in the series from Blue Sky Studios (Rio, Horton Hears a Who!) – I don’t think I’ve been missing much. We meet up with woolly mammoth Manny (Ray Romano), sabre-tooth tiger Diego (Denis Leary), and Sid the sloth (John Leguizamo) as their herd (including Manny’s wife Ellie (Queen Latifah) and their teenage daughter Peaches (Keke Palmer)) get caught up in the cataclysmic separation of their landmass, casting Manny, Diego, Sid, and Sid’s eccentric Granny (Wanda Sykes) out to sea on a mass of ice.

As our trio of heroes (plus 1) try to reach the destination where Ellie, Peaches, and the rest of the herd will meet them, they encounter simian sea pirate Captain Gutt (Peter Dinklage) and his crew, including first mate Shira (Jennifer Lopez), a sabre-tooth tiger who ends up with conflicting feelings about her captain and Diego.

With all the effort the filmmakers behind Ice Age: Continental Drift put into the action scenes and stunning visuals (especially the breathtaking sequences of the giant land mass breaking apart), they should have devoted more to character development. Ironically, that devotion would be a major undertaking, for by continuously adding new characters with each film in the franchise, it leaves directors Steve Martino and Mike Thurmeier with the unenviable task of finding a purpose for each character in what is now a cast of dozens.

This overpopulation is also a far cry from what made the original Ice Age’s core trio of Manny, Diego, and Sid fun to watch. Martino, Thurmeier, and Continental Drift’s trio of writers seem to agree, for the main plot sends Manny, Diego, and Sid (and Sid’s Granny) on their own adventure, relegating the rest of the cast to a B-story of trekking across the remaining landmass to reunite with our heroes.

The dialogue and jokes in Ice Age: Continental Drift rarely rise above the level of sitcoms or Saturday morning cartoons, and laugh-out-loud moments are at a minimum. The only exceptions are the adorable, hyperactive hyraxes (who form an Ewok-like alliance with Manny, Diego, and Sid to help bring down Captain Gutt) and the ongoing hilarious antics of Scrat the squirrel and his never-ending pursuit of his elusive acorn. Outside of that, the script largely serves to advance the plot to the finish line, peppered with mawkish Valuable Lessons and Very Special Moments about love, family, father/daughter relationships, and not forgetting your true friends.

If Pixar classics such as Finding Nemo and The Incredibles are gourmet meals, then Ice Age: Continental Drift is Chinese food: It doesn’t stay with you, and an hour later you’ll be hungry for something more substantial.

Rating:

What did Dash and Jack-Jack think?

Dash and Jack-Jack both enjoyed Ice Age: Continental Drift, though neither raved about it afterwards. I’m guessing that, like their father, they found it suitably entertaining at the time, but pretty forgettable afterwards.

Is it suitable for your kids?

Ice Age: Continental Drift is rated PG for mild rude humor and action/peril.

Mild/rude humor: Sadly, there is so much name-calling that it’s impossible to list them all here, but a sampling includes “freak,” “wiener,” “stupid,” “loser,” “idiot,” “tubby,” “cry baby,” and “pinhead.” In addition, Granny makes a couple of off-color quips, such as “I’ll bury y’all and dance on your grave” and “If they kiss, I’m gonna puke.” Also, Sid exclaims “Holy crab!” after seeing a giant crustacean, and a child animal asks Ellie, “When you drink through your nose, does it taste like boogers?”
Action/peril: An extended sequence shows landmasses separating violently, causing animals to run and panic; some of the fights between Manny’s herd and Gutt’s pirates are pretty intense, with weapons in heavy use; Gutt makes verbal threats to various characters, and attempts to kill Ellie and Manny during the finale.

Will your FilmMother want to watch it?

My wife enjoyed Ice Age: Continental Drift, though I’m guessing it won’t rank as one of her all-time favorites. But it made for a passably fun family film outing while it lasted.

Ice...ice...age-y.

Ice Age: Continental Drift
* Directors: Steve Martino, Mike Thurmeier
* Screenwriters: Michael Berg, Jason Fuchs, Mike Reiss
* Stars: Ray Romano, John Leguizamo, Denis Leary, Jennifer Lopez, Queen Latifah, Peter Dinklage, Keke Palmer, Simon Pegg, Seann William Scott, Wanda Sykes
* MPAA Rating: PG


Rent Ice Age: Continental Drift from Netflix >>

Labou (2009)

*SIGH*. Another week, another anemic selection of G-rated kids’ movies on Netflix.

We wind up with Labou, an independent children’s film where three tweens – Toddster (Bryan James Kitto), Gavin (Darnell J. Hamilton), and Emily (Marissa Cuevas) – set out in the Louisiana bayou to find the lost treasure of Capt. LeRouge (Barnie Duncan), but on the way discover a cute little swamp critter named Labou.

After Opposite Day and Labou, I’ve had about all I can take of marginally talented kid actors speaking paragraphs of adult dialogue. For what it’s worth, Kitto is the best of the three kid stars and delivers his lines with the most conviction.

What’s even more frustrating is how the kids react upon meeting Labou. Most kids would probably say something like, “Omigod, it’s some kind of alien lizard creature! I hope it doesn’t have a taste for human flesh!” Instead, they’re merely curious about their not-of-this-earth discovery, and after five minutes they’re having an impromptu musical jam with him(!).

Labou is an animatronic creation (think Gremlins’ Gizmo crossed with a frog) who’s convincing enough to satisfy kid viewers, but adults will be much more cynical. He feels like he could have been plucked from a Jim Henson reject pile.

Even worse than his unconvincing appearance, Labou disappears from the film for stretches at a time – forcing viewers to sit through either a) the three kid actors trying to carry their scenes; or b) unfunny slapstick and insults between a pair of bumbling father-and-son developers (Earl Scioneaux and Chris Violette) who want to raze Labou’s swampland home and build an oil refinery.

While it’s too little too late, the last 20 minutes of Labou does hit on the magic that the rest of the film struggles to deliver, and it all ties up nicely at the end.

Bottom line: Writer/director (and veteran FX artist) Greg Aronowitz obviously made Labou for kids, and in that respect, mission accomplished. It’s a perfectly harmless, highly disposable children’s film that parents shouldn’t (and won’t) take too seriously.

Rating:

What did Dash and

Jack-Jack think?

Labou may test the attention spans of very young children, but gradeschoolers will probably find it entertaining. To that point, Jack-Jack had almost no interest in the film, giving up halfway through, while Dash stayed with it, paying attention at every line of dialogue and laughing several times. His final summation: “It wasn’t too bad.”

Is it suitable for your kids?

The only minor concerns in Labou are some name-calling (“loser,” “idiot,” and my personal fave, “Billy the Skidmark”) and a brief scene featuring a drunk person.

Will your FilmMother want to watch it?

She may enjoy the fact that Labou is almost totally harmless for children, though like most adults, I doubt she’ll actually enjoy it herself.

Aaarrrgh, indeed.

Labou
* Director: Greg Aronowitz
* Screenwriter: Greg Aronowitz
* Stars: Barnie Duncan, Darnell Hamilton, Bryan James Kitto, Marissa Cuevas, Earl Scioneaux, Chris Violette, Ray Nagin, Kelson Henderson
* MPAA Rating: G

Rent Labou from Netflix >>